Hi everybody my name is Suz i m a chinese and going out with an indian guy for nearly two years. I really love him and we are so connected and i know that he is the right guy for me. However because of the Indian culture, society my boyfriend's parent dont know me. He always worry about our future because he is not sure that he is able to marry me. I really love him and really want to marry him. I saw his cousin and friend in India and most of them think we wont have good ending. Please give me some opinion what to do? We decide to move together first and then think about how to convince his parent. I dont know if his parent say no what is his action? He say an Indian guy marry a foreigner or even Indian girl with another class is a shame of the whole family. I really dont want him to get into this situation but i really want to be with him forever.

Hi Suz,

Please believe me that Indian parents can be very liberal. All you have to do is show affection towards them. Do not introduce yourself immediately as his fiance!!! If you have the time, follow this elaborate trick I have invented. Go to your fiance's house, but do not reveal your relationship, pretend to be perhaps office collegues. A year or more of this trick will however convince them. This trick worked in getting my cousin married to his swiss girlfriend inspite of having ultra conservative parents. But believe me honesty is the best policy. do not give up!! Make sure your boyfriend is not trying to wriggle out of the relationship by blaming his parents.

Hey do not forget to post pics when you are married

Hi Braznor, thank you so much for your reply. Ya i agreed of your suggestion. Actually we are planning to do like this hopefully around Oct next year i m going to move to India and stay with my boyfriend. After our life settle a little bit he will bring me home but we wont tell his parent our relationship. Maybe after they know me for sometimes and it will be more easy for them to accept me. Now what i m trying to do is learn Bengali because his mother dont know English and learn more about hindu culture. Hey thank you so much, of course i will post our picture when we get marry.. woww.. i never give up because i know he is the right guy for me. Ya ur right from time to time i have to encourage my boyfriend because he is always scare about our future. But dont worry i will never give up and the coming February i will go to India for holiday and stay with my boyfriend and see his brother too. Anyway thanks for your support.

What you're experiencing is probably infatuation. It happens to all kids, one time or the other. Don't take it seriously and give it a religious/national color. If it is not this guy, it could've been someone else; it is that simple. Very few people know love. What they do know is lust, which often masquerades as love. Don't fall for this.

Dear Sut-Putra

Please read Suz's post carefully. She is having this relationship for the past 2 years and it is one transceding national borders. Under such circumstances I'am not inclined to think it is mere infatuation, but instead a more serious and mature relationship. Please respect the same. Regards

Dear Sut-Putra & Braznor, thank you so much for your reply. Sut-Putra thank you for your opinion but actually i think my situation is not just like kid's game to be honest i m not young i m already 30 years old and have been with one chinese guy for 6 years. After i seperate with this guy for four years i met my bf. When we start dating ya i also think about whether it is an illusion. But after this two years i m sure that this is a real relationship not only illusion or dream or game. Of course we grown up under different culture and he live in India but our relationship not just love relationship is more than that. We like couple, friend and also partner especially in mental & spiritual support. His family believe in Hindu and he believe in Hindu but interest in Buddhism. Actually until now i only know a little about Hindu thats why i m trying to know more about Hindu as well. Also i believe in some theory of Buddhism thats why we both are supporting each other to be growth in our spiritual life. Anyway thank you so much for replying me because i really need u guys support and opinion. This is the first time i share this on the web because most of my friend are chinese and this situation seems strange for them. Anyway i hope we can keep contact and u guys feel free to share ur opinion and from day to day i will update my situation on board. Thanks u guys.. take care

Best of Luck Suz!!!!!

I m also a chinese girl, i have the same problem as Suz.My boyfriend is an indian, I know him in the UK, we studied in the same university, and then we fall in love, we keep this relationship two years, we want 2 stay in uk, and after settlement,we want 2 marry, but we face the same peoblem,which is his parents dont allow him 2 marry a foreigner, they thinks it s shame on his family, i dont know what 2 do just now.i really love him very much, i m afraid that he will give up.could u give some opinions, i dont know how 2 solve this problem just now.

Hi ying..hey i understand ur feeling.. really sometimes it makes you feel very helpless.. right. In one hand of course u dont want ur boyfriend to against his parent but on the other hand of course u want to stay with him and marry him.. Ying i really understand ur feeling..but what i can say is never give up because ur boyfriend really need ur understanding and support. Remember dont push him to chose and dont let him has any feeling u want him to against his family because u will put him in a very difficult situation. As i know family is very important to an indian especially for the guy. To be honest i m not sure whether this work or not but at least we give a try to persuade his parent and just give them sometimes to know u more. What i believe is all parent want their children happy and have a good marriage.. right.. so if ur boyfriend parent know u more and understand u really love ur boyfriend and they will understand one day. I dont know whether my opinion is useful or not but please never give up and always support ur boyfriend and he will know ur not selfish but really love him. Then he will do something for this relationship...this is my experience. Anyway we can keep in touch and support each other because we are facing the similar problem. OK!!.. Take Care!

Suz